He had ventured outside alone to ponder over the words of wisdom Brightsplash had offered him. For days, he thought about how meaningful it was to him, although he was certain to keep this possible change-of-heart to himself, at least for now. But there was one thing he couldn't deny: he wanted to make her proud. The apprentice didn't understand where this overwhelming urge came from, and it frustrated him. Change- he'd do it for her, or at least try to. Frostpaw remembered her talking about socialization, about getting out there because his clan loved him.

The idea of "making friends" was almost painful to him, like it was a dreadful job. He was dragging his paws just at the idea of it, but thinking about how much it might make Brightsplash smile...it was enough motivation. With his head held low, the tom glared into the earth that passed beneath his paws, asking himself why he was so suddenly dedicated to pleasing the older warrior. Wrapped up in his thoughts, Frostpaw forgot to pay attention to where his paws were leading him, causing him to roughly thud into Cherrypaw.

"Watch where you're going, piece of-" He bit his tongue hard, so hard that he might have forced himself to bleed. No, he swore that he'd try making friends now, try changing himself so that his clanmates would love him, not resent and avoid him. The silver feline wanted so badly to scream his face off and blame his fellow apprentice for everything, but he held it in to the best of his ability. "I'm sorry. I was being a fool, not aware of my surroundings."

Frostpaw studied her for a moment. He was never around the cats near his age, likely because of his overall cynical attitude. However, he was positive that Cherrypaw wasn't supposed to seem this gloom. "...Are you ok, Cherrypaw?"

He understood- he was acting out of his typical norm, so she had every right to feel and act dubious of his sudden behavioral change. Any other day, he'd happily mutter something bitter under his breath and stomp on his way, but he was trying to change. Brightsplash had allowed him to realize that he didn't want to die as some decrepit loner. Indeed, he enjoyed his space and such a strong independence made him feel unstoppable, but...

Frostpaw glanced away from Cherrypaw, as if that would somehow make her feel more comfortable in his awkward presence. "...I know I'm probably not the most ideal cat to talk to." Which was honestly true, since most often his words were filled with threats and essentially screamed "run away, and fast". He played with the earth using his paws, struggling to find security himself. "...but I've felt like my whole world's turned upside down, too. I lost my siblings not long ago, they were all I had left."

She had said that she was simply "out of it", but Frostpaw had been there. The difference between exhaustion and distress were easy for him to recognize, since he'd been there. Even if his relationship with his siblings had been...well, rocky.

...she was actually happy to talk with him?

For a brief moment, he dropped his gaze as a sensation of heat washed over his face. Brightsplash had been the only cat willing to sit in his company, and it would seem that her words of wisdom and held through. Maybe a handful of his clanmates were willing to be his friends- with time, of course. They weren't complete strangers to him, but with how he typically behaved...maybe they were like strangers to him. Was it his fault the entire time?

He tried to tell himself it wasn't, just to make his pitiful ego feel better.

Finally regaining his confidence in an awkwardly embarrassed moment that utterly confused him, Frostpaw was finally willing to raise his head and patiently listen to what Cherrypaw had to say. It didn't appear that he was actually getting to what was eating at her, seeing that Mothkit had to have been deceased for a handful of moons. He doubted that was bothering her currently, but perhaps it had an effect. Family matters, perhaps, since she was buying into the sibling-talk.

...wait, why was he even trying to get to the bottom of this, anyways?

He had socialized, and that was what Brightsplash had wanted. He was done then, right? Well, why did he want to stay??

"I'm sorry to hear that." The silvered apprentice didn't know what else to say. "Sorry" was a rare word for him, and it felt foreign and unnatural for him to say. "At least you got friends, right?"

"Uh, well..." He immediately grew awkward at the mention of having multiple siblings, growing hot underneath before fidgeting around with sudden, jerky movements. Stiffly, he scooted to face away from Cherrypaw, ears flattened against his skull specifically out of his unexpected discomfort. Frostpaw had never discussed his siblings with anyone before. He just got a few "sorry about your lose"-s, and a handful of "they'll be missed"-s.

Really, he had never cared for his siblings. They were practically acquaintances to him, perhaps even worse because of how they treated him from time to time. In fact, he had loathed some of them, and there were so many that...well, he didn't remember all of their names. It was all sort of a blur. "...I never got along with my siblings very well. I was the butt of every one of their jokes. Even my parents forgot about me from time to time." Time to time? No, they always forgot about him. He was too small, a pebble among a sea of spotted coats.

He shot his gaze down to his paws for several heartbeats. "...But I do feel bad for never appreciating them. I was tiny and I was always taunted for it, but I should've tried at least a little harder."

Wow.

He had never admitted that. The sudden softness caused him to feel an overwhelming sensation, a need to regain his tough exterior and strong ego. "B-But keep that to yourself, can't have everyone running around knowing 'bout that..."

It was beginning to become a struggle for the silvered tom- his eagerness to please Brightsplash told him to do things right, but now, Cherrypaw was praising his old ways. Why were social matters so difficult, and how in the name of StarClan did it come so easily to some cats? Pushing the thought away, Frostpaw offered her a reassuring smile while he briefly glanced up at her, almost as if too embarrassed to keep eye contact with the apprentice for too long. Why did he suddenly feel so...awkward? "Your secret's safe with me."

At times, he wondered how different his life would be, should his littermates have survived or even respected him in the first place. Would he have been a happier guy? Heck, would he have actually grown a little bit taller? Regardless, this was his situation now, and he had to learn to embrace it and force life to be in his favor if necessary. He had been torn down enough in the past couple of moons, and now, it was time that he build himself up to greatness.

He thought on his clanmate's situation for a few moments, wishing to help her more than anything else. For a while, he finally felt selfless- his mind on Cherrypaw, and not on his own complications. Whatever Dancingflame had decided to hide, it was clearly something huge and meaningful, likely against the code, something that might bring shame to Cherrypaw and her family. Therefore, he had to keep it a secret, and he would- he'd carry it with him to his grave if necessary. Never before in his life had someone shared a secret with him, so he'd be lock-and-key.

"It must be hard on her as well, if she kept it buried away for so many moons." Frostpaw finally spoke up, after thinking on it for several silent moments. He adverted his gaze back to his little paws, pushing around a pebble while he delved back into thought. "...I hope you can forgive her, with time. I know what it's like to push your family away, and I don't recommend it. But know that I'll always be here for you, if you feel that you can no longer look to Dancingflame."

...Wow, did he really just say that? What in name of StarClan was he doing?