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Post by theatricals on Mar 11, 2019 15:22:23 GMT -6
"...then get upset when it rains."
Kadaj was a suspicious cat by nature. He did not necessarily believe every cat had bad intentions, but certainly /different/ intentions. Each cat was selfish in their own way, even if no one wanted to admit it. So when he stared in the face of a Clan cat for the first time in moons, it shouldn't have been strange. He had encountered several over the course of his life, and it almost always ended in them driving him off, or them walking away.
Why, then, did he think he might be staring into the face of his brother?
They were older, had grown into their bodies. They had to, at least. It was a shot in the dark thinking that the tom was Shrikepaw--or whatever he called himself now. For a moment, he considered the idea of it being a relative, but then he scoffed. What relative? Based on his appearance, he couldn't be Shrikepaw's kit.
It was still entirely possible that this was just a complete stranger who happened to look similar. Even with his suspicions, he couldn't say he remembered exactly what his siblings looked like. Maybe he just needed something strange, something exciting, or even shocking to wake him from his sleepwalking habits. It was for that reason that he stood near one of the shallow pools by the border, waiting and watching, wondering if he might actually be able to catch anyone of interest. Standing there, he might be able to fool cats into thinking he belonged--but any cat over the age of six moons should be able to tell the truth.
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Post by niftyshark on Mar 15, 2019 18:07:23 GMT -6
With the sickness raging through the WillowClan camp, Shrikewind felt utterly out of his league. What was he supposed to do when half the clan couldn't function? There were only so many patrols he could assign, and the cats who remained healthy were being run ragged. It was risky, because working the remaining cats meant there was a greater chance of them getting sick. The medicine cats couldn't find the right combination of herbs to cure the illness. And to make the situation even worse, Floodstar was one of the cats sick. That left Shrikewind attempting to bear the mantle of the clan, and under such pressing circumstances, he could barely work through the stress. He felt trapped, strangled, unworthy. Family of the sick demanded answers, demanded their kin get better, demanded that he take charge. But he was simply at a loss on what to do, and he couldn't deliver what his clan needed. If he couldn't handle this, how could he be WillowClan's future leader? The thought was short of terrifying.
The moment a mouse whisker of freedom presented itself, he bolted from camp. His pace was controlled as he left camp, of course, but as soon as he was out of view, Shrikewind ran as fast as he could. He didn't pay attention to where he was going or how long he ran for--the only thing that made him stop were his aching legs and burning chest. When he came back to awareness, he looked around in confusion. He was by the outlands border, and... there was a cat standing there, in the distance. Distinctly familiar, which for one reason or another filled him with annoyance. "Huh. I must be hallucinating." He rubbed his eyes with a paw to clear away the strange cat in the distance, then moved to a nearby tree and thunked his head against it. "You aren't going crazy, you aren't going crazy..." he spoke to himself quickly, and he prayed to StarClan that he was right.
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Post by theatricals on Mar 16, 2019 20:56:36 GMT -6
Kadaj watched in fascination as a cat drew closer, and to his relief it was the cat he was hoping to see. He knew of the irony in that statement, but thought nothing more of it. The tom almost stood up to greet the Clan cat, but found himself both confused and amused as he began to thump his head against a tree. Apparently some cats were just that unusual--or crazy, he reminded himself. Pulling himself to his paws, he made his way around the small pool standing between them and padded forward, stopping half-way between them, leaving more than a few fox-lengths between them. Kadaj wouldn't be the one to step forward onto the tom's territory, in plain sight, and then be accused of trespassing.
"I think there are better ways to deal with your issues, if you're interested." It wasn't a real offer, and the other cat would probably be able to tell that, but it was at least better than a flat "hello."
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Post by niftyshark on Mar 24, 2019 13:07:54 GMT -6
Shrikewind nearly screamed when he heard a voice cut through the air near him. While he didn't shout, he did leap back from the tree in abject horror. Someone was there? He was alone! He... his head swung and his eyes locked on the cat who spoke to him--the hallucination. He squinted, but after a few moments it became apparent that the cat was not a hallucination. Even beyond that, it was a cat who was becoming more and more familiar the more Shrikewind looked at him. It took a moment for the stranger's words to register, but when they did, he groaned. "Why are you here? My breakdowns are my own business. You aren't allowed to watch them." Stranger still was that the tom he encountered only a moon or two ago now stood at WillowClan's border, but he wasn't in the right frame of mind to question it properly yet.
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Post by theatricals on Mar 25, 2019 15:21:49 GMT -6
Kadaj couldn't hold back a laugh--although it came out as more of a gargled choke, as he did at least attempt to keep his amusement to himself. After taking a moment to recover, he took another step forward, remaining careful not to provoke the tom too much. "I'm on my own side, and I was here first. If you'd like to leave and have your breakdown elsewhere, then by all means." He dipped his head as if to say farewell, but beyond that, the tom barely twitched. After raising his head once more, he stared across at the tom, curious and cautious at the same time.
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Post by niftyshark on Apr 6, 2019 10:33:42 GMT -6
Shrikewind narrowed his eyes. His wits came back to him quickly, and his expression sobered. "Leave where? I'm on my territory. You're the one who is unusually too close." Now that he was thinking properly, he grew suspicious. Why was the outsider a pawstep from crossing the border? He drew closer to the border himself, his pawsteps careful, body posture tense. "I doubt it's because you can't get enough of me. So, speak. Why are you here?" He stopped when he was a rabbit-length away, staring right into the outsider's eyes.
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Post by theatricals on Apr 10, 2019 15:22:35 GMT -6
Kadaj tilted his head forward, making his ears appear more prominent and his eyes more intense as they stared back at the tom. They had never received each other's names the last time they met, and Kadaj wondered if the other cat would even bother giving his, even if he asked. "Can a cat not seek out company? It can be very quiet. I merely thought I should properly thank you for saving my life." Even though Kadaj didn't see it as being true, it did not hurt him to boost the tom's ego, if anything. His pride wasn't so great that he couldn't at least pretend that the tom had helped him.
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Post by niftyshark on Apr 13, 2019 18:26:51 GMT -6
His slanted gaze turned into a full-on glare when the outsider answered, and Shrikewind partially wished that he didn't ask. It probably would have been better to send the tom away than to engage with him, but the outsider provided a good distraction that Shrikewind didn't even know he needed. "A cat can, but a wise cat probably shouldn't seek out a clan cat's company." And as far as he remembered, the tom stole his kill and wanted nothing to do with him after being rescued... and now he wanted to thank him? It seemed more fishy to Shrikewind than WillowClan's streams. He squared his shoulders. "If you want me to believe that for even a heartbeat, you have some convincing to do. Maybe, you know, paying back that bird would help. It might make me think you aren't as half bad as your flattery is."
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Post by theatricals on Apr 17, 2019 21:56:28 GMT -6
Kadaj let out a short laugh then. It wasn't mocking, but more amused than anything. "I stand by what I said before. If I caught it, it's mine. It wasn't in your territory, if I recall, so you would have no claim to it otherwise." Although he had put in the effort to explain how he thought, he wasn't so concerned that he felt he needed to dwell on it. "Anyway," he said dismissively, flicking a tail. "A 'wise' cat I might not be, perhaps, but we are both still cats. I fail to see what makes you any more threatening than I." Even with his hazy memories, he could never remember feeling that the Clan cats were any stronger. Talking with Silver, he had told her this directly, although he had been so young that he could scarcely remember what he said.
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Post by niftyshark on Apr 24, 2019 19:17:36 GMT -6
“You practically knocked it out of my grasp,” he said with a sniff. He was trying to understand the angle the outsider was coming from, but he couldn’t. It seemed like he wanted something, but Shrikewind couldn’t understand what it would be either. It was frustrating, but like the tom said, he was on the correct side of the border, so there was little Shrikewind could do. “Me by myself, I’m not threatening. But a whole clan behind my back... perhaps that is more so? You’d be wiser if you never came back.” He paused. “I’m skeptical that all you want is company. You have any other cat for that. So what do you really want?” He hardened his tone, as if to suggest that he wouldn’t take any deviation from this topic.
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Post by theatricals on Apr 26, 2019 13:21:23 GMT -6
"I want you to stop looking at me like I'm an actual danger to your Clan," he said flatly, but his eyes flared. "Having twenty cats against one doesn't make you courageous or noble--it just makes you all bullies. I respected your borders, and I have not /stolen/ anything." He put emphasis on the word. The bird he had caught was neither the Clan cat's nor his own Clan's. Kadaj might not own territory, but anything beyond the borders was fair game in his world, along with those who lived this life. Peering at the tom for an even longer moment, he straightened up, breaking the silence with, "But it matters none. I am not here to lecture. I am looking for my brother."
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Post by niftyshark on Apr 26, 2019 20:19:16 GMT -6
Shrikewind felt like his point flew over the tom’s head, but he didn’t bother correcting him. Any thought relating to that flew out of his mind instantly when the outsider continued speaking, and he scrambled for words. Something like deja vu danced in his mind, but it was so subtle amidst his cynicism that he didn’t immediately notice it. “Your... brother?” he repeated in confusion. Multiple following questions clogged his brain, and he bit down to prevent them all escaping at once—he didn’t need incoherent gibberish on his growing list of embarrassing stunts. The deputy worked his jaw as he quickly sorted through them, then he asked, “What makes you think you’ll find him here?” While WillowClan accepted outsiders in the past, there weren’t any male outsiders in their clan. There was no way his brother would be here. He wasn’t sure what would make the tom think that, considering the strictness of clan borders, but he didn’t waste his breath with that discourse.
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Post by theatricals on Apr 26, 2019 20:27:59 GMT -6
Kadaj had been hoping the tom might understand right away, but that might have been hoping for too much. He had wanted to avoid giving details if he could help it, but now it seemed he had very little choice. Kadaj peered at the tom, almost waiting to see if he would have some sort of idea, but eventually he acknowledged the fact that he would have to speak more, as this tom was entirely clueless. "I would have to /guess/ it is because you Clan cats are very much against cats leaving your Clan. So unless my brother decided to go rogue, he would still be here. Do you need any further information?" He almost looked bored, waiting for a response, but it was unlikely that he would give any deeper details.
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Post by niftyshark on May 16, 2019 21:22:30 GMT -6
His mind was stuck on one particular thought with the new information given, and he struggled to get past it. Was... was the tom saying what Shrikewind thought he was? If no outsider joined the clan, that could only mean that the outsider was once a clan cat. The tom did seem knowledgeable of clan customs, more than he should for an outsider. The sense of odd familiarity Shrikewind felt before also made the thought in his head more plausible, but he had one mindset for so long that it was hard to confront it. The evidence was too hard to ignore though, and so he was left at a standstill. He couldn’t bring himself to say what he wanted to say, to say the one thought that was on his mind. “Why... why are you looking for him?” he asked instead, his voice weaker as the wind left his sails, as the implications of the entire situation came crashing down upon him.
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Post by theatricals on May 18, 2019 16:18:06 GMT -6
Kadaj sense of entitlement was not something he had grown out of entirely, but it wasn't like he was expecting this cat to walk him straight to the camp. It wasn't even something he really wanted--he had no interest in Clan customs, even with his knowledge of them. He had many moons behind him, and he had to grow up here. He was far more comfortable with Silver, the open sky above them. Even speaking to the tom was suffocating in the most basic way. When the Clan cat questioned him further, Kadaj's eyes finally narrowed. If he was wrong, then he was wrong. It would bother him little. But if he was right, then he was in a position that he could never hope to be in again. "Well, I don't think he bothered looking for /me/," he responded sharply, following up with, "Is that not correct?" It was a sharp jab, and one he hoped stuck.
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Post by niftyshark on May 27, 2019 16:38:20 GMT -6
There seemed to be more than one meaning in the tom’s words, and Shrikewind tried to sift through it carefully. Of course, that was hard when he felt like he couldn’t follow even one thought properly. He tried to focus on one thought at a time, and as he did, more and more thoughts flooded him. He didn’t know why he was being asked for confirmation as if it was something he should know. How could he, when he didn’t know the outsider? Did he run into the outsider once when he was younger and merely forget the encounter?
When he was younger... that was an entirely plausible scenario. Maybe he did know the tom at some point. There was that sensation of familiarity he noticed before, and the exhaustion Shrikewind felt from talking to him. It reminded him inexplicably of someone specific. But even then, he was filled with doubt.
It felt like no time had passed, but he saw the tom staring at him, waiting for an answer. There was only one that came to his mind, so he asked, “What is your name?” It didn’t answer the other tom’s questions at all, but it was the only thing Shrikewind could focus on.
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Post by theatricals on May 29, 2019 21:36:10 GMT -6
"Kadaj," he answered smoothly, lifting a paw to swipe over his face, as though merely swatting a fly. He almost thought to leave it at that and nothing else, but clearly this tom was not in the mindset Kadaj hoped for him to be. Unlike the Clan cat, he didn't hold as much doubt as to who he was speaking to, but who knows--maybe he was wrong. "But I believe you might have known me by another name." He almost thought to speak it out loud, but it had been a long time. The tom had grown, of course, but there were still many parts of himself that he did not want to acknowledge. As grown-up as he had tried to be, some things were better left buried.
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Post by niftyshark on Jun 12, 2019 20:33:06 GMT -6
The name was utterly unfamiliar, and he didn’t bother trying to say it. He was more focused on what Kadaj said after. “And what name was that?” It was a strange circumstance, trying to face what was well enough his past, and how he viewed it presently. If Shrikewind wasn’t already at the point of having to face things he couldn’t believe, he might not have so readily asked. Most were causations of his own design, and this circumstance wasn’t too different. His sneaking suspicion was growing far less uncertain, but he still needed to hear it to be fully convinced.
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Post by theatricals on Jun 20, 2019 21:52:31 GMT -6
The look Kadaj gave him might just be considered a glare, but he didn't stare long enough for it to truly register. His gaze remained hard, however, as he held himself higher. Could he have been trying to prove something? Perhaps, but why he'd want to may have been a mystery. In reality, they were two strangers who barely knew one another. "I think you know. Or, at the least, I had the hope you were intelligent enough to take a guess." His last word came as a hiss, the only thing that truly expressed his impatience on a real scale.
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Post by niftyshark on Jun 29, 2019 12:40:50 GMT -6
Shrikewind didn’t want to guess. He was afraid to. What if he was right? What would it mean for the acceptance he came to? It was easier to live in ignorance in that moment, since he already had so much to think about. He shook his head at Kadaj and took a step back. “I-I can’t.” He didn’t care what the outsider thought of his intelligence. It wasn’t something he could handle at the moment. He wasn’t ready to face his own suspicions. “You should have just told me.” His tone was a little accusatory, but he was mostly worn down. He looked at Kadaj for one more moment before he turned away, shaking his head and mumbling to himself.
(fin?)
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